Shameful Otaku Secret!

Actually, Geass 1 dub thingy

Saturday night those of you who are US-based and aren’t too awesome for dubbed cartoons on TV might have noticed that Cartoon Network is airing Code Geass season 1 after the still-trucking Death Note. Personally I really like Adult Swim and I love the fact that they show some of this stuff. They’ve shown some greats in the past: Trigun, Eureka Seven, Cowboy Bebop, Wolf’s Rain, even Satoshi Kon’s Paranoia Agent. Now, follow that with Code Geass. But it got me thinking, and that’s never good.

Why do dubs suck?

I don’t want to get into the dub-vs-sub war, but if I rant on my blog I can at least have a one-way conversation that’s more intelligent than trying to talk about it on 4chan or something OMG DUB SUX. But what makes dubs so hated? Is it the over-localization? Or perhaps Funimation-style “repurposing” the likes of which turn Shin-Chan into an (admittedly hilarious) adult cartoon? Yes, very literal fansubs let you infer based on your pitiful knowledge of moonspeak what might actually be going on, whereas localization forces its interpretation on you. But that doesn’t bother me much. I guess I always knew my own answer, but seeing the dub of Geass, formerly starring Jun Fukuyama, it drove it home: There are five fucking people in this business.

Starring: Crispin Yong Vignogna

Hi! I am tired of hearing your voice!

While watching Spice and Wolf, it’s hard not to wait for Lawrence to make some fruity pose and Mikuru Stare someone into buying his 18,000 suits of armor. Likewise for at least 27 other characters this season. But watching American dubs, that effect is multiplied by a thousandfold.

It would make a great office pool game to bet on how many seconds it takes in the first episode of any show before Crispin Freeman shows up. Saturday night was my first ever viewing of the dub, so I instantly thought two things: One, why wasn’t it Karen instead of Kallen? Two, Johnny Yong Bosch? Fucking really? Wait, three things: BADASS MOTHER.

A matter of octave

But really, as much as you do hear Jun Fukuyama, and as much as his only vocal mannerism seems to be “rampant egotism,” how exactly do you match up his voice with Johnny Yong Bosch? Fabulous Itsuki? (actually, I did like his Itsuki dub, and his Vash role was one of the best, but that just proves my overuse point further…) Either way, it reminds me of how in Evangelion, Shinji was voiced by a girl and her voice was still lower than Spike Spencer’s.

Lots of people tell me when I meet them that I should go into radio. That is a compliment that makes anyone feel more like a man, and sure, I need all the help I can get there — but what I’d really like to break into is anime dubbing. How would I go about this? Not sure. Not interested in going back to school to learn acting, or moving to California, or any of that.

Maybe if I walked into a convention, slapped Dick Cox with a glove and shouted “I demand satisfaction!” in front of his entire legion of blobby fangirls, some ancient rule of duelling would allow me to usurp him. As long as it did something to minimize guys who sound like puberty laughed and sped by them on a moped. I know they’re hard workers, and talented and whatnot, but Crispin Freeman is the only person in dubbing who doesn’t make my ears bleed, and you can’t use him for everything — or can you? I think that was my point.

What the hell happened to this post?

Well, that went long. So, let’s do a one-sentence summary of the show this post was supposedly about — Lelouch convinces Rollo not to kill him by saying he’ll bring C.C. to him, but instead manages to trick him into joining the Black Knights with a little faux love, while simultaneously saving the would-be-executees like Ohgi and Toudou by sliding all the Brits bodily into Chinese Federation territory where they can’t shoot without starting a war.

Also, Pizza Hut sightings: ONE.

The Plan For Japan’s Independence

Everyone is blogging Geass R2 this season. I was going to just count the Pizza Hut references, but instead I want to pose a few questions.

1. Are they giving out Geass in action claw machines, or as some bloggers have postulated, free with Pizza Hut orders of over $20?

2. When does the bunny suit portion of the show end? Isn’t that kind of stuff supposed to come later in a show when interest is waning? I mean, we already have the, uh, nontraditional Knightmare frame. Give the poor girl a hint of dignity for fuck’s sake — she’s a revolutionary, not a member of Prince and the Revolution!

3. More to the point, does this screencap look ironic to you?

4. Why is everyone hating on Suzaku so bad? He’s frustrating, perhaps retarded, as a person, but as a character I’d call him ok, I mean you gots to have the arch-enemy. I am a little disappointed the Ultimate Face-off between him and Lulu didn’t really happen, but whatevs.

5. Doesn’t Zero remind you of anyone right now?

Perhaps:

Another disturbing thing I just caught: the opening animation of the map shows the center of the Brittanian Empire as being the Americas? What? I know I’m obviously late to this party, and I will allow Japan their customary xenophobia, but at least get your whiteys straight, people. The year 1776 ring a bell? We hate those guys! Well, not really, but you know what I’m saying.

Tune in next week to see whose cuisine will reign supreme! (Hint: probably involves cheese, crust, and tomatoes)

Return of the Pizza Hut Revolution

While I’m not pooping my pants, aka Macross Excitement Level over this, I’m glad to see Pretty Boy LeDouche come back to attempt to liberate helpless Japan from the wrath of the honkies in the name of siscon once again.

Like a bitch!

Story

Lelouch is still in school in the Tokyo settlement, but things seem a little off. He has a younger brother Rollo, his gym teacher looks a lot like Villetta (and her name’s… Villetta?), and he doesn’t seem to have a Geass Eye anymore. Plus, he’s back to gambling on chess games.

Something is... off.

Most of the Black Knights are in prison, including Colonel Toudou. The remaining ones have fallen under the temporary lead of C.C., who makes it her mission to recover Lelouch. Her scheme to lure him into a chess game and have undercover bunny girl (yar?) Kallen grab him doesn’t go quite as planned, but in the end it’s a successful recovery after a good bit of chase stuff.

Yes, with chest! Er, chess...

With a bit of a smooch, C.C. restores Lelouch’s memory, and it’s bye bye Brittanian soldiers.

This time, its a SEXvolution! yeeeah.

It seems that the Emperor/King himself has now employed Suzaku, and possibly V.V. is on his side as well, so I’m guessing this season will be a little more of a personal fight staged over the backdrop of the revolution.

Thoughts

This episode very cleverly paralleled Geass’s first one, with the re-awakening of Lelouch’s powers happening in a similar scene to the initial bestowing of them. But Zero’s introduction, complete with gothy poses and Mikuru Stare, was played for far more of a Fuck Yeah Factor than anything previously in Geass.

Dance with me! We shall go to the Goth club and smoke clove cigarettes and do that taffy-pulling dance while they spin Sisters of Mercy records! FOR NIPPON!

We still didn’t get a real answer to the cliffhanger of the first series. It seems that Suzaku and Lelouch did indeed come to a truce in order to rescue Nunally, but what happened after is anyone’s guess. How would they be a match for V.V.? Lelouch already used the Geass on himself, so how was his past wiped so effectively? Perhaps C.C. did it to hide him. And speaking of all that, where is Nunally?

Kill whitey! Wait did I really capture a tooltip in my screenshot? Where is QC in here?

Overall, the animation quality is still up to par, not to mention HD now — say what you will about Sunrise (aka Studio Gundam) but they have the cash to keep things consistent. I think Geass is one of the more stylish things they’ve ever done, in spite of the somewhat Gundam-esque mechs. Scoring is still epic and dark, theme songs (both by Orange Range of Bleach fame) still unimpressive. I think the only one I really liked was the first ED by Ali Project, and even then, you heard one of their songs and you’ve heard ‘em all.

But let’s hope they keep track of what made Geass so cool to begin with: It’s an action-packed robot fight, a dramatic collection of emotional cruelties and deadly secrets, all wrapped in a Death Note-style rumination on what happens to people when they gain unspeakable power. Oh — and a Pizza Hut commercial.