Shameful Otaku Secret!

Or best anime EVER?

It really has everything you need from an anime:  Mecha, angst, a girl in a China dress, exploding heads, amnesia, revenge, Masumune-Shirowism, an Itano circus… Moe.

Don't say it... Don't say it...

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuck

Did you ever hear the phrase “greater than the sum of its parts?” Probably have.

How about “lesser than the sum of its parts?”

There you go.

That about sums up Baldr Force EXE, a 2007 4-episode OVA by Satelight (no Kawamori connection here). It’s a somewhat generic story about a future where people spend most of their time living inside the virtual internet world of the Wired while somehow mysteriously not degenerating into fat slobs in the real world (thus the Shirow-ism). Hackers and security professionals drive around virtual mechas called Simulacrum, and for some reason dying in the Wired kills you in the real world. Not sure what the upside is.

Hacker Tohru is recruited by the other side, as will occasionally happen to hackers. He accepts the job to exact revenge for his slain bro, but of course everything isn’t quite what it seems.

The animation is typical of Satelight (Noein, Macross Zero and Frontier): well executed and computer assisted, but with massive failures of anatomy and off-model characters occasionally presenting themselves. The exploding heads, mecha battles, and one motorcycle chase are easily the highlights here.

The characters are totally forgettable, and the story mostly so, but while you’re watching it’s good fun. Somewhat 90s-esque, (also somewhat Gonzo-like, but the two go hand in hand), overall not a bad way to spend about 80 minutes.

OH YEAH — it does have one horrible plot device in it, though.

horrible.

11 virtual rapes a second. Anyway, go check it out, the internet security experts over at Funimation have it up for free on YouTube shows.